FEDERATION OF CHIROPRACTIC
EXAMINING BOARDS
SAN ANTONIO, TEXAS
2001
Don Ellis, Ed.D.
Provost/Administrative Vice President
Texas Chiropractic College
At Texas Chiropractic College, I really do call myself the "Edupractor". Among our many chiropractors, I had to come up with a respectable title. I really preferred "Edupractic Physician" but in Texas they wouldn't let me use that title.
I'm thankful or the opportunity that has been extended me this morning. I'm honored by it and I promise that I'm going to limit it in length but I ask you to show some sensitivity and please, please do not judge the length of my remarks as a valid indicator of their depth.
You know, I conjointly live in two rather weird worlds. Both confuse me to the point that I have serious concerns about each of them. As I get older, I have grown seriously concerned about the lack of sanity in both my worlds. My primary world is, of course, the greater U.S. of A., which presently presents me some major concerns. Let me share a few of these regarding the state of existence in which we live today. Feel free to respond in any way you wish. You might want to say, "Amen", "Oh My" or "Ouch" as things strike you.
*I'm concerned about political projects that force upon each of us counterfeit kingdoms in the form of a sociological Promise Land, while only token efforts toward meaningful medical care, education, socialization or reformation are being made.
* I'm concerned about the psychedelic, cybernetic, plastic, neon world that's out there waiting for our graduates. It's a health care mad house where inmates run the asylums, a medical menagerie where monkeys are apparently in charge and where an endless row of experts never reach conclusions.
*I'm concerned about the Health fads that we face daily that change like women's fashions.
* I'm concerned about our level of pseudo sophistication, when actually our age is the most gullible generation in terms of buying gold bricks and white elephants that we've ever experienced. All present practicing professionals not excluded.
* I'm concerned that some of my fellow edupractors are brainwashing students into states of confusion rather than competency.
* I'm further concerned when these same edupractors ascribe intelligence to the student who answers their questions and radicalism to the one who questions their answers.
* I'm concerned about the ultra-new morality facing us where environmentalist wacko parents correct their children for stealing watermelons by saying, "Don't you ever do that again, you don't know what that thing has been sprayed with."
* I'm concerned about the stupidity of our country's smartness -- is it progress when we have polluted the very air we breathe until we are having to wheeze our way through smog, when we have polluted the waters until our rivers have become cesspools and sewers for industry. When our cities have become jungles of crime. When we live in a madhouse of earsplitting noise which may force this present generation to wear hearing aids along with their gas masks -- when you're safer on a battlefield than on a U.S. highway.
* I'm concerned about our present society having grasped the mystery of quantum physics and seemingly rejected the simplicity of the Sermon on the Mount. Our world has achieved brilliance without wisdom - power without conscience. Ours is a society of nuclear giants and ethical infants. We know more about war than we know about peace, more about killing than we know about living.
* I'm concerned about simple statistics which show that there are people in Southeast Asia, Bangladesh, and San Antonio, Texas, who are suffering the starvation effects of malnutrition. While the Weight Watcher's cookbook stays at the top of the best seller's charts.
* I'm concerned about the excitement of having sent the Discoverer shuttle to Mars when we have yet to learn how to live on this earth.
* I'm concerned about the artificial wealth that our students enjoy today and the journey that they are taking to the poor house with their guaranteed student loans and their credit card Cadillacs.
* I'm concerned about this fantasy, this farce, this mirage we Americans call progress. Sure, we've learned how to lengthen life - but not to deepen it.
* I'm concerned about the progress of modern medical science. Its advances literally boggle my mind, and yet we have more illness than we can treat.* We also have a fantastically developed public educational system and yet more ignorance than we can eradicate. We have the most specialized legal society on the face of the earth and yet more crime than we can just legislate. We have extreme amounts of knowledge in mental health treatments, and yet more psychosis than we can analyze, more love, and yet more hostility than we can control. More understanding of people, and yet more prejudice than we dare to admit.
* I'm concerned that we've been unable to solve what I consider the four most pressing problems of this society and they are not Medicare, Medicaid, Social Security or the stock market. Rather they are the problems that have been haunting us for some time, problems of poverty, pollution, prejudice, and peace -- a lasting, meaningful peace. Not just another cease fire in the Middle east and a conference table. Instead of permanent peace, we established a permanent peace conference.
*Lastly in regard to my concern for America, I'm concerned about the caliber of our television programming. Some of the programs are getting so ridiculous that my grandchildren have returned to doing their homework at night.
Now, that's just a few of my concerns and I'm sure yours too about the condition of the U.S. A, but enough about America's concerns. I've got to hurry for I still have that second world to worry about. It's one we share. It's the weird and wacky world of chiropractic--Don't you love it?--where you put two chiropractors in a room together and you get three opinions and then they unite and start a new Chiropractic Organization.
What was that? Did you hear that voice? It came from somewhere in here. It clearly said, "You had better stop here, Don. Don't wear out your welcome to this audience. You can achieve your objection with out antagonizing everyone. After all, these present are all lovers of chiropractic and it's in this world of Chiropractic where you presently live, work and serve at the pleasure of Texas Chiropractic College's President, Dr. Shelby Elliott. Besides he's is listening to these remarks." Actually, I just wanted to give him some notoriety and recognition because he thrives on it so much.
However, let me confess something. As professionals in chiropractic, we do have some problems that really frustrate me as a professional problem solver serving the profession. It's simply that I don't have the answers for you. Frankly, I have to admit to you that I while I can do a reasonable decent job at articulating the questions, I'm extremely confounded when I seek the answers. However, as a seasoned, semi-theological professional, I vaguely remember an Old Testament issue that touched on some similar problems and the Supreme Being extended those unsuccessful problem solvers a solution. That solution just might have some applicability for me this morning. The Supreme Being said:
If my people who are called by my name, shall humble themselves and pray, and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land. II Chronicles 7:14.
Does that hold a potential answer for us? I think it may and I want to expand on it and see. However, Paul Revere and the Raiders (anyone remember them?) they once recorded a hit song entitled, "Too Much Talk and Not Enough Action." Rest assured, I am not going to let that be the concluding theme to my morning session. I'm not going to play that old number. I'm going to take action and do something about our problems. You see, I am like those two chiropractors with the three opinions. I'm really going to start a new chiropractic organization and by now, maybe you're beginning to guess where I'm going with the program's title of my remarks. I have a solution for the problems of our weird world of chiropractic and it begins with the name--CHIROPRACTIC.
Here we go. That Old Testament scripture clearly said "If my people who are called by my name!" O.K. professionals in chiropractic what names are you called? What do the various publics in your profession call you? Chiropractors??? Well, not without the modifier "straight' or 'mixed' tagged on. Chiropractic physicians? We can't get together on that in Texas either. How about Choir-practors?? Quacks? Bone Crackers??? For that matter, what do you think your own national Practice Builders call you? Johns!
Hey, you know these names better than I do because you've heard them longer than I have. And yet, patients call you HEALERS. I think would be prouder of that than anything the world could call me.
But be honest with me just a moment. Don't we have to agree that some things are not all that positive in our weird world of chiropractic that we love? Well, fret no more, contrary to what you may think, it's not too late to take a wait and see attitude. No wait, that came out wrong. It's too late to take a wait and see attitude. Oh, never mind on that.
Bottom line, it's not too late for corrective action--not "too much talk and not enough action". For today, we act! As bad as things may appear, we have the solution but we might have to put a new spin to the name of Chiropractic. You see, this morning, in the brief time I've been allocated, I'm proposing an entirely new twist to the name "Chiropractic" and Straight or Mixed will not be modifier. I further propose the immediate organizational formulation of a dynamic, new support group where we can all unite, gather under one banner if you would, and heal our land as well as some of our professional schisms. Today, we bridge the chiropractic CREED-ability gap and become healers of ourselves as well as our patients.
I'm not too sure you heard me on that. I said CREED-ability and not credibility. Yes, I said CREED-ability. You know, your CREED, as in your foundational belief, the dogma, the truth you hold most dear, your tenet, your faith, your assurance of things hoped for, your conviction of things not yet seen. That's your CREED. Our morning's task is to simply bridge the CREED-ability gap. Let me make myself perfectly clear on one thing, Chiropractic does not have a credibility gap. Credibility is when someone believes in you and rest assured your patients do believe in you. Chiropractic has credibility. The question is--how can we bridge our CREED-ability gap? I think I have the answer.
Again people, the issue I'm talking about here is CREED-ability and I've made a study of this. While chiropractic does not have a credibility gap, I sincerely believe the profession has a CREED-ability gap about the size of Grand Canyon. However, this new dynamic support group I propose will provide us all a forum for mutual respect as well as a gathering place where we can focus on where we agree, not disagree and membership is open to everybody the world over. It will have at its very foundation our CREED-to respect, to recognize and to help all those who seek our healing care.
Sooo, here it is. Today, I propose for the entire interested world the united creation of a new national chiropractic organization called (you guessed it) CHIROPHILES ANONYMOUS. An organization that will bring us all together in one accord and be the clarion rallying call for all of chiropractic. I further propose that our session this morning be the first official meeting of that new organization. Prepare yourself, we have a special guest speaker to kick off the meeting. We've got to hurry now, because I don't have 24 visits to bring this entire auditorium to a more healthy posture.
PLAY THE ARE YOU READY FOR THIS TAPE
Hi, my name is Don (you're all supposed to say, "Hi, Don"). Now, I know what kind of meetings you have been attending. All right, I'm gonna back off and start this all over again. From the top:
Hi, my name is Don. I'm a chirophile but I can't hep it. I had no intention to ever let this back monkey thing dominate me. I started chiropractic innocently enough.
I was ten years old and my mother took me to old Dr. DeBones to screen me for scoliosis. After the back screen, he adjusted me and it felt good.
Of course, he wanted me to come back three times a week for the next six months but I didn't cause I wasn't hooked chiropractic. Well, I did come back a few times but I wasn't really hooked. I just didn't want to quit right then. Well, I guess I really wanted to but some how I just didn't do it. I wanted a little more.
Then in junior high school, I sprained my shoulder and old DeBones rotated it. I really didn't know you could move your shoulder that many ways.
I told him right there and then that I didn't need chiropractic. I wasn't an addict. Oh, I knew I should have quit, but I wasn't addicted. I was just merely hanging in there for a few feel good moments. The teachers in junior high school tried to tell me; they warned me; they seemed to know where I was headed. I just didn't listen. I didn't want to quit.
Couple of years later in high school, I pinched a nerve in my back and couldn't play football. The coach came right out and told me that I would never play a down for him. After Dr. DeBones' adjusted me every day for two weeks, the nerve was O.K. but the coach still wouldn't let me play. He said that, "I wasn't good enough to even make the team." But the truth of the matter, he just didn't have no respect for a chirophile or a chiropractor. He even called old DeBones a quack and used several other expletives about his mother and her marital status or something.
That's when I first realized I couldn't quit. I loved chiropractic but I was alone, I was afraid, I was ashamed, I was anonymous and more importantly, I needed an adjustment.
For years after that, I floundered my life away just looking for a support group. Only last week, I considered ending it all. I thought about going to an allopath. But now I've found CHIROPHILES ANONYMOUS and I want to get back on the program. I need you. We all need each other if we're ever going to overcome this world and its wiles. We need each other if we're gonna bridge the Chiropractic CREED-ability gap.
Okay, I will admit it, I'm admit it, I'm a Chirophile and I've fallen off the wagon once or twice, just like you--just like all of us. I've fallen off time and time again. On lonely nights, I felt like there was no hope for me. I was just a drop out. Until today, I wouldn't ever come to a meeting like this. Why just yesterday, I wanted to end it all again but most Allopaths were out somewhere playing golf. Sure I have excuses for not staying the course and being true to chiropractic , a lot them. I bet you have even used them a time or two yourselves. Here's some:
THERE WAS JUST TOO MUCH PREJUDICE OUT THERE AGAINST CHIROPRACTIC FOR ME TO COME OUT OF THE CLOSET UNTIL NOW.
I REALLY DIDN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT CHIROPRACTIC WAS ALL ABOUT THEN WHEN I DID, I THOUGHT THAT THERE WAS NOBODY ELSE OUT THERE THAT BELIEVED IN CHIROPRACTIC BUT ME.
I FIGGERED I COULD GET BETTER ON MY OWN IF I WOULD JUST TRY HARDER. I THOUGHT MY REAL PROBLEM WAS THIS DOWN TREND WE'RE HAVING IN THE ECONOMY.
SOME HOW, I JUST LOST MY REAL ENTHUSIASM FOR CHIROPRACTIC.
BUT NOW THAT I'VE FOUND YOU AND THIS DYNAMIC NEW ORGANIZATION, I'VE SEEN THE LIGHT AND AM READY TO TAKE THE TEN-STEP PLEDGE!
The CHIROPHILES Anonymous
10-Step Pledge
All you CHIROPHILES out there join me in
this pledge! Say I with me!
I AM
THE MOST ENTHUSIASTIC,
THE
MOST MOTIVATED,
THE MOST DEDICATED,
THE MOST HAPPY CHIROPHILE IN THIS AUDITORIUM.
CONCLUSION
Now, get serious with me just one more moment. On September 2nd 1945, meeting on the U.S. battleship Missouri in Tokyo Bay, American General Douglas MacArthur and Japanese General Yo-she-jerO Uhh-mea-za signed the treaty officially ending World War Two. As a military historian, I want to relate to you what happen then. After the treaty was signed, the moderating official, Fleet Admiral Chester Nimitz, simply stood and proclaimed, "Gentlemen, these proceeding are concluded" and they were. His words even though they have no applicability to us this morning echo my sentiments now but I hasten to add a last quote from a present day philosopher. It was made only yesterday, April 4rd, 2001 by Dr. Laura on the conclusion of her radio program, She said, "Now, just do the right thing."